I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
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