HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Randomize
