Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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