if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
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