I want to have your abortion
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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