The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Randomize
