I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
