we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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