last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
Randomize
