I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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