Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
