i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
