I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Randomize
