I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
