Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
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