okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
When the vodka monkeys are playing a drum solo in my skull tomorrow, remind me I tried to sterilize my body from the inside with titos
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
