She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
