maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
