I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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