Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Randomize
