do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
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