i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
