Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
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