I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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