Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
