You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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