You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
