therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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