I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
