This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
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