She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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