They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
Randomize
