Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
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