I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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