I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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