now i know why i became what i already was.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Randomize
