The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
