Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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