OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
