Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize