It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
