its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Randomize
