you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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