In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
Randomize
