we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
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