oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
