he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize
