Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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