we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I deserve to be covered in dicks
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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