They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
